As kids, we face this
question, and then, kids are found to face this question from us, the “whom,”
relating to myriad relationships. But primary is that with parents, as either
the parents ask or others, “Whom do you love more…and who loves you more…mom or
dad?” And then, expectant are the looks, difficult to discern, who, is the kid!
The question could be
apparently innocuous, and presented playfully, in joyous, and celebrating joyous,
circumstances. Yet, it is far from so…as, what meets the eyes physical is an
immeasurable fraction of that immeasurable whole that is visible to inner eyes,
and waits for its visibility to the physical ones. More on it…but, before that,
over to the answer that the kids are found to forward (as I too did)…call
forth: Musing…pondering…it is an answer in favor of none as is in favor of
both, “Mom and dad, both…” extended with a smile. Then, the child is cajoled
and coaxed: “C’mon… It cannot be so. You must
be loving one of them more, one of them must be
loving you more. Shall give you a
chocolate. Now, tell…the truth…”
If only we know the Truth…
The kid stands the
ground, no nudges, enticements, able to budge the kid…and gets the label, the
kid, of “diplomat,” “intelligent”…and the question-hour session comes to a
close with laughter… But the laughter and the precursors are not exactly
registered as joy, as they imprint the psyche with confusion, that comes to
haunt and taunt, quite unbeknownst…
If only we know the Truth,
this question, in the first place, wouldn’t be extended…
As far as the kid is
concerned, it could very well be that the kid, still hasn’t forgotten the Truth…Eternal…its
connection with the Source…Love…Divine, and thus, knows Love Is…Love isn’t
measurable. That, when it is Love, there is no point in trying to quantify or
label it. These very attempts though tempt, but when lured, sure is one to
experience a tortured mind…experiencing the ruptures in the mind…those
conflicts…confusions… At the same time, the kid could be deciding in favoring
of none by deciding in favor of both, simply because by so doing it perceives
that it would be pleasing both…or it wouldn’t be incurring the wrath of none… Yet,
such questions, go on to imprint the psyche with people-pleasing tendencies,
choking thereby the passage that transmits the authenticity, choking the
experience of authenticity, as sought is not authenticity, the consensus
thought to be the determinant of one’s life and living. Besides, such
questions, present the difficulty to the kids, which, apparently, might not be
perceptible: To choose between the two loved ones…discriminate… Love, the
Ultimate Healer, Binder, is called forth to divide…and that, is not Love, as
Love would never ask to choose, Love would never divide….
The agonies, that kids
of separated families undergo, bear testimony to the heart-rending effects of
this superficial reception and extension of Love. So, do we have to put forth
this question to the kids?
Love is the very verve,
reference of life, and doesn’t play out as preferences. Love is God, The
Source, the Universal Energy of Creation, expressed, and is Unconditional. And when
Love is presented or experienced as “degrees,” as conditional, the experience
is of what Love is not. Each expression of Love is a unique hue, incomparable,
and in asking to choose, lost is the experience of the essential essence that
Love is…and experienced is pain…and it is Rumi, as always, relaying, with
absolute clarity, the Truth of Love…the Sole Reality: “That which is false
troubles the heart, but truth brings tranquility.”
So, shall we allow the
kids to enjoy Love, enjoy being loved, enjoy the Ultimate and Sole Security,
instead of asking such questions which, in the long run, turn out detrimental
to growth, mental and all-round? Or would we keep on running on the same track,
projecting ourselves neither as adults nor as kids, experiencing a “loose
connection,” a dissonance with our very own essence…innocence…Love in form that
we are, loving not truly the Love in form that we are, unaware of Love…unaware
of Who We Are? As we sow so we reap. As we propagate, so and that, we grow…
Every time is put forth
the question, “Whom do you love more…who loves you more…” brought to the fore
is the unawareness of our very Core.
So? Many a time, a
question, in answer to a question, has been found to lead to the answer, which,
earlier we ignored, yet, can no more!
Sushmita,
March 25, 2016
P.S. Thanked is The Speaking Tree, the print edition, of
March 20, 2016 for leading to the quote by Rumi.